Wedding bells!!!

Right, so yes, uhmm...
To make a long story short, or at least to try to make it a little less long...
The Boy and I are getting married!!!!
Jeyyy!!
Well, of course you already knew we were engaged, but we actually decided to push the wedding (push, shove, drag, whatever) forward.
To... October 31 2011.
That is in ten weeks. As in 70 days.

Right.
I know...
It's okay, we still love each other.

Before I begin, let me warn anybody who does me rambling on about our wedding plans, or likes to hear (and look) about wedding dresses.
You are warned!
Okay, done now, read on.

We actually decided this a little over a week ago. Last Monday Joris checked with our Town Hall (where we will be getting married) if they had a spot left for that day, and they did! So now I've been into wedding planning-mode this last week!

When we first got engaged earlier this year we had planned on getting married on June 16 2012. The day we met. An in 2012 it falls on a Saturday. Perfect, right? Wrong. That meant everything was extra super-duper expensive! And well, we're not super-duper rich. And you know, with just having bought our Home, Joris' old house still not having been sold (any takers?), remodeling our Home (yes, we are still in the middle of painting walls, laying down floors, sanding floors...) me wanting to start a course to become a goldsmith next year (other story, other time)..

And to be honest over this past year I haven't been seeing most of my friends. And even when I try to make time for them, they don't seem to have time for me anymore. I know some are still shocked that Joris and I bought a house and moved in together (as am I). And others just had changing lives themselves. Moving house, moving in together, changing cities, changing lives (having babies. Not me, but some of my friends did) makes you loose friends I suppose...

My family, well, that's a whole story, chapter, novel, trilogy in itself. And Joris' family.. Lets just say, we both come from broken homes.

Anyway. I have been feeling left out, forgotten. With my friends and my family. And after my not-so-great-birthday this year I was left feeling really lonely and sad (and obviously sorry for myself). I just didn't see the point in having a big expensive party anymore.
I am just too scared no one will show up.
Adding to that some family-drama...

So... we are eloping!
Sort of.
Our immediate family will be there (parents, sisters). That is to say, they are invited, it's their choice whether or not they'll show up.
We are still planning on having a party on June 16 next year, but it will be without a ceremony. So a lot less expensive and not as emotional. I hope that will help me with the planning as well. I was getting so worried about, well everything and everybody. I was not having any fun anymore, at all.

The stress was really getting to me. So now we are celebrating twice!
At our Town Hall they marry people for free. Every Monday morning at 9 AM and 9.30 AM.
So we were very happy when we heard we could get married Monday, 31 October 2011, at 09.30 AM. (we chose October 31 more as a joke. Because we couldn't find a date that fell on a Monday this year/next year that had any special meaning to us. And I like Halloween, so there you have it!)
It's very sober, small, cheap and tiny (I prefer calling it, simple, minimalist, intimate).
But I think it's right for us. At this time and space.

It's going to be short and sweet.
After the ten minute ceremony we'll be on our way Home to enjoy a brunch, made by yours truly. (at our Home, so that means we have A LOT to do!)
After about 3 hours our guests will (hopefully!) escort us to the train station http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif(about a ten minute walk) where Joris and I will go on our first trip together! Our honeymoon!!
We will go, by train and boat, to Vlieland (a small island just off the Dutch coast), for a three or four night stay.

Soooo, that is giving me 10 weeks (70 days!!!) to plan this whole wedding!
The first thing we want are rings.
I tend to get very emotionally attached to jewelry, so a wedding ring is a very big deal for me! We decided on a ring (I am saving the pictures). In fact, it's the only ring Joris really liked as well. But we are a bit short on, well, money. So the rings will have to wait for now. (I might sound all cool and calm right now, but trust me, on the inside I feel like a two year old having a tantrum!)
So, rings sorted. Kind of...

On to my dress!
I always loved tea length dresses, with petticoats, big and small! Just give me anything from Dolly Couture or Lena Hoschek and I would be in dress-heaven!
I really wanted to wear a dress like that on my wedding day. Maybe a bit more toned down, especially now we're eloping, but you get the idea.
Unfortunately, even though those dresses might not be the most expensive dresses you could find, they are wayyy out of my price range.
So I went on to the big 'oll internet to find myself a dress. A wedding dress.
And I found a dress!!!
In like, two days!!
It was perfect!!
Everything I wanted for my elopement wedding!
It was a white, tea length wrap dress, with 3/4 sleeves. And a collar!
And in my size! (I am a large girl, so finding something that fits is sometimes a challenge)
I could see it.
It was a pretty picture. It involved a petticoat, 1940's hair and red lips..
Oh, did I mention the dress was only $35? (and $15 for shipping, but still $50 in total!)
Yes, I know...
So I bought the dress (first waited for two days. Decided I was crazy for not buying it already so I just bought the thing!), payed for it. Waited for them to tell me they had shipped it to me...
Waited.. waited some more..
Then I got an email saying the dress was too damaged for them to send it to me. And that it was the last one they had.
They offered me to pick something else from their store. For $35 or lesser value.

Wait.... What....?!?

There is nothing else I want from their store. Or any other store. Not for $35 (okay $50)!
I am not too ashamed to admit that I cried.
Not then and there. No, after two days of looking at every sort-of-white-might-fit-could-work dress.
It was not a pretty picture. I was getting desperate I tell you!

So, after looking at thousands of pictures I found one. One, that might work. Might be okay. Might even be white-ish (even if they call it 'ecru' in the description).
It's not $35, but it's close.
Actually it's 25 Euro's, so I guess it is $35!
The only thing is... I need three of them.

Yes, that's right. Three.

So that's 3 x 25 + 5 for shipping = 80 Euro's.
That's $112.
(did I tell you I am on a budget???)

So, here's the thing.
It's a dress. But it's a very short, summery dress.
Wait, here's a picture:


(Bought here. Not really a "pretty" store, but uhm.. 70 days! So..)

Yeah, I know, it doesn't scream: fall/autumn, October 31, Town Hall, elegant, elopement wedding.
This I know.
That is why I bought three.
I want to cut them up and sew them together, to make a long (ankle/floor length) dress.
I'm also going to sew the halter-ties-things to the back, so it becomes a "normal" dress.
And out of the scraps of the two cut-up dresses I plan on making some sort of sleeve. I'm guessing short and fluttery.

Sort of like this:

(Image found here)

But very different, and with sleeves.
And maybe a bit more 1920's..
Like this:


(Image found here. They have some lovely other dresses!)

Hmm, still no sleeves..
How about this:


(Image found here)

Or something like this. This should be do-able, right?

(Image found here)

Now, keep in mind I don't know how to sew.
At all.

I'm sure everything will be alright.
At least that's the phrase I keep repeating to myself in my head, so no-one can hear me.

I am trying to envision myself in that dress. Standing next to Joris. On a beautiful fall/autumn day. With red and gold colored leaves on the trees and on the ground..
Maybe even snow.. Or sunshine.. Or rain.
Then we will have big umbrellas (make mental note: find and buy huge umbrellas!) and we will be standing under said umbrellas... just the two of us, and maybe some family members...

I might try to make the dress a bit more 1920's. With some pretty (embroidered?) ribbon round the neckline, maybe an Art Deco brooch...
Can you picture it?
No, me neither. Not yet.
Hopefully the dresses will arrive tomorrow evening. Then I can see them, feel the fabric, try one on.
I hope they fit!
I reallly hope it will work out! Because I don't have a plan B. Well, this is my plan B.

I feel a bit sad, not having the dress I always wanted. To not be able to have the party I always wanted.
And it's okay to feel a bit sad about it.
But I have a wedding to plan! A fantastic man to marry!
So we can be husband and wife, together.

In a way I think it's so much better for me to have to plan this wedding in 11 weeks (10 weeks from today!). This way I won't be able to get to distracted from to main thing: Getting married.
Not the wedding. Not the dress. Our marriage.
It's about setting priorities. I want to be married to this man. He wants to be married to me.
After that I guess it's rings. Because we will wear them (hopefully!) the rest of our lives.
Everything else is just icing on the cake!

And since I am making our own (wedding)cake, I can put as much icing on it as I would like!
Right?

Got myself a new ride!

What a whirlwind of a move it has been!
So many things went wrong, that it sometime felt as if nothing would ever be right again.
The house is still a mess, and does not feel like a Home yet. But that will come, in time.

Everybody tells you it's going to be great, and I'm sure it will be (and it's coming now, it's getting better), but oh boy, did we have a struggle! Not just with the move, but with each other as well. I definitely have some issues! I did/do not feel comfortable living in a house that is not (completely) mine. That I can't pay for on my own. Joris and I fought, we cried, we laughed, we loved each other, and we know we want to be together. And so we are being nice to each other, even when things don't go as planned. Sure, I cry (but really, I always cry a lot) but we still love and like each other! In all honestly (and maybe I'm sharing too much here), I think that it was the hardest thing about the move. But we made it!

I want to show you this house/home/mess I keep talking about!
However.. I can't find the cables for the camera to hook up to the computer.. (that tells you a little bit about how big a mess it is!)
So you'll just have to take my word for it for now.

Oooh, I have some other news!!!
I bought a new (to me) bike!!!
I life in the Netherlands, and don't even have a drivers license (they are very, very, v e r y expensive to get here) so I use my bike to get around (trust me, this was NOT easy when moving! And I do not recommend it if you want to keep your sanity). But my old bike had had enough and it was broken beyond repair...
So this left me stranded. I could walk or take the bus, both limited me a lot when I wanted to get around town.
I looked for over two weeks! To find something half decent and that I could afford. We looked at three bikes, but no luck.. Until yesterday evening! It was a bit more expensive then I planned, but, oh so lovely!
It's a Batavus Florence. I have no idea how old she is (10, 15, 20 years old???), but she has seven gears and is in great shape!
Now, I'm no computer-wizz, but I'll try to show you the picture of her that was on Marktplaats (a Dutch version of Craigslist)



Isn't she lovely?
She looks almost blue/black in this pictures, but in real-life she's a very dark metallic green. In some light she might look black-ish, but in the sunlight she sparkles a lovely dark green!
I'm kind of smitten, can you tell?
She'll be getting a new (to-me) Brooks saddle (I'm so curious as to find out how that will ride!) and maybe some new grips.. Definitely a basket! I don't particularly like the extra weight in the front of the bike, but I always wear skirt, and therefor always have a (hand)bag.. And I need to keep an eye on it while I'm riding my bike.

My other love (Joris) just got home, so we're off! Going to ride our bikes and enjoy the sun while it's here!

First and last night, see you on the other side!

Yesterday we slept in our new home, for the very first time!
It was.., well, kind of weird. Nice, but it felt like we were camping, or staying in a hotel. And we kind of were. I mean, we have no lights yet, so if I wanted to go to the bathroom at night I had to use a flashlight. And because we don't have any curtains yet it felt as of the whole neighborhood was looking in (which I'm pretty sure they were, we've had so many comments!)
And it hit me, really hit me, for the first time. I am moving in with somebody else! I won't have a home of my own anymore! I won't be able to just spread out in bed (I love to take up the whole bed! I usually look like an X, with my arms and legs spread out!), or, you know, tell him to go home when we have a fight. It felt like a lot to take in. And it still feels kind of daunting. I'm sure it will be great, once we're settled, but for now it feels really quite strange..

Today we spend making room in our new home for all our (read: my) old stuff. Tomorrow (in 15 hours to be exact) a friend of mine, who has a van, is coming to help us move all the big stuff (sofa, wardrobe, fridge, washing-machine, you get the point) and we are no were near ready!
All the rooms are still so full of stuff that the sofa won't be able to get to the door! So right this minute, as I type, Joris (I love you so much, baby! I really do appreciate all that you do for me!) is packing a moving-box with some of my many, many books and dvd's.

Me? I do help, really, I do! It's just, right now I'm all worn out. I can't seem to find the trees through the forest anymore. It feels like, no matter how much stuff we take out, the rooms just don't seem to get any emptier... How does THAT work?!
But we're tired, and we need to get some sleep.

Tonight is going to be our last night in my old home (we're sleeping here tonight, because it's easier when we start moving stuff in the morning. And we still have a mattress on the floor here). It feels like I'm closing a chapter, and I won't ever be able to go back to it. I always get this way when I move, and I'm sure I'll be sobbing on the floor before I hand in the keys.

So, goodbye for now. I'm not sure if my internet connection here will continue for long. But Thursday (IEK!!! It's almost Thursday!!! Please, no! I just need a little more time, just give me two more days!) we will be done, that's when we hand in the keys of my old, single, home. at least, I hope so...

See you on the other side!

Final days..

Just a quick post because we have been very busy (and still are!).
We've been hard at work, and the new Home is getting there, slowly, but surely.
I have to leave my old house on Thursday July 7, and there is still sooo much tot do!
We hope to be moving next week, Friday or Saturday, if we can find someone with a van to help us that is!

But, before I go on, first some more pictures of our Home as it is/was in the 'Before'!
First up, is the bathroom! Well, what to say about it.. It's small. It has a shower, and no, the grout is not just dirty, it's been painted green by the previous occupants! Not to bad, but they, ahum, didn't actually do it very well. We tried to paint over it, using special grout paint, but, uhm.. it's mainly sticking to the tiles, and not really to the grout.. Yeah.. kind of sucks (more because it took up a lot of time and effort), but we'll deal with that once we live there!
I present to you: THE BATHROOM!



The washer and dryer are going to be in there as well, to the left of the sink. It's going to be a squeeze, but that's fine. Bathrooms can be changed, altered and remodelled. Right?

Next up.. The livingroom!!!
As these are the 'before' pictures, I can tell you, the living room does not look like this anymore..
For the moment it's being used as storage for the oven, dryer, dishwasher, paint, floors (that still need to go down in the other rooms that need to be painted first), etc..
But.. the biggest change are the garden doors! We now have double-doors!!! I promise I'll get some good pictures of the new doors, they are really quite lovely..

THE LIVINGROOM!


This side hasn't changed that much.. Love that view, if there isn't a van parked in front of our house (it's the neighbours van..) we have a lovely view of a pond with ducks! Love that!


This side looks very different now! It wasn't bad like this, but I/we wanted two doors we could open in summertime! It's going to be lovely!

Now, this post isn't over, but I am feeling a bit sorry for myself today, so be warned if you read on.. I guess it's because I'm tiered from working at the house for over six (6!) months, and it that time of year..

Tomorrow is my birthday, and (as usual) I have a bit of the Birthday-Blues.. It's not unusual for me to feel this way around my birthday (and I seem to get it around New years as well), but with all the work that has to be done it's not very helpful!
Because we are not nearly as far with all the work as we should be, my birthday will be spent painting. And maybe that's a good thing. I wouldn't be able to sit and enjoy "birthday-stuff" knowing that we still have so much work to do! And painting is definitely one of the more "fun" things to do! Well.., I actually do not enjoy the painting itself (it's ok for small stuff, but after a while everything just starts hurting, and we still have a lot of rooms to paint!), but it can be so gratifying to see the result! All the hours, days, weeks, months of hard work, and then to, finally, put on a beautiful coat of paint! After de paint come the floors, and then the room is ready! Then it can be filled with treasures and can be used to create beautiful memories!

To be honest I am both dreading July 7 and really looking forward to it.
I am somewhat worried that we won't make it in time, that we won't get the work done.
But if (and when) we do, it will be great! Then we can finally start living in this lovely Home! Love it the way it's supposed to be! Be able to actually see my friends again (I've missed you!!)!! To take some time off from working on the house, even if it's just for the night! I can't wait for fall, hopefully by that time we're settled in our new Home, and we might have even unpacked one or two things!

I can't wait!

Almost there!

So after a lot of interviews we found ourselfs a builder!
It wasn't an easy task, because we have a tight budget en limited time, but we finally found someone who could make us a staircase, new patiodoors, do some electricalwork and some plumming for us!
And so far, we are really happy about it!
He is making recordtime! We thought it might take somewhere between 3 to 6 weeks for him to be ready, but as it looks now, he will be done next week!!!
The stairs went in THIS week!!!!

This is great news!
This also means that my fiance and I will have to go back to work ourselfs!

We hope to get the last changes done ourself and then it's time for cleaning, filling holes, painting and putting in floors! Then: the move!

I love the idea of living there, but I am dredding The Move... I have a lot of stuff, and always start to panic a bit when I realise all that STUFF has to be packed, caried down 6 (six!) flights of stairs, put in a van and be placed and unpacked at the new house.
The fact that we don't own a car (I don't even have my licence!) makes me a bit scared. And totaly dependend on other people.
I don't like that.

But, I'll deal with it, I'll have to!
And it will be fine, so far it has always worked out.

Every now and then I get a bit house-tired. Then all I see are the things we have to do, have to sort, clean, pack, think about... To relax I sometimes take a day (or half a day) "off". I go to see someone (and beg then not to ask about the house!) or I go and look a wedding stuff!
Because, I am going to be a bride next year!

But, for now, I'll show you some more of our lovely home!



This is a picture of our bedroom (it even has a balcony!!!!).
It's no longer orange (I really do not like the colour orange).
People kept calling it the 'parents-bedroom' and I kept thinking: "Hu? this is not my parents bedroom! It's my bedro... ooh!"
It's not the biggest bedroom, so not officially the 'master-bedroom'.

The biggest bedroom is The Blue Room



You can get why we call it the blue room!

It is also no longer blue.. but we still call it 'the blue room', kind of confusing for people who haven't seen it in it's blue state!
This is going to be our guest room. And (maybe someday) a childs bedroom.
For now it's going to be my fiance's study, until we can finish the attic.

Still have to take pictures with my new camera!
I have taken it out of the house now!
I just bought a Banana Hammock for it, so now I can put it in my bag and go!
I just haven't dared to take any pictures af the house in it's current state.. Probably because I was scared to even walk around there... :p!

It's been a while...

Sooo. Yea, it's been a while...
Sorry about that.
I'll be better, really, I promise!

A lot has happened these days, weeks, months.
My boyfriend and I got the house! Jey!
And it's in a lot worse shape then I thought.. It was dirty (like really, really DIRTY... Not nice..) the day we bought the house the heating gave out.. So it was cold, like freezing cold...
But we cleaned and cleaned and cleaned and then we cleaned some more!
We got the heating fixed so we were no longer freezing while doing al this cleaning and we could just grab hot water from the tab (let me tell you, how spoiled I have been to always have heat and warm running water! And how much I missed it when I didn't have it.. And how exited I was when we got it fixed!!)

The boyfriend is also no longer my boyfriend...
He is now my fiance!!!
Oh my! I knew he was planning on "someday" asking me to marry him, but I never thought it would be this soon!
He gave me a promise ring on my mother's birthday (5th January) and we had talked about getting married before, but I never thought that on Saturday 29th January he would ask me to marry him!
He said he had planned to ask me this Valentines, but he couldn't hold it in any longer.
Aaaah, it was so sweet!
Oh, yeah, I said 'yes'!
So after remodeling, fixing up the home and moving we have a wedding to plan!
We plan to marry on Saturday June 16, 2012.
It seems like a long time away, but I already had a panic attack about the plates for dinner.. Yea.. I'm like that...

My brain is trying to come to grips with all this exiting news! And sometimes it's a bit overwhelming. But all in all really good!
My poor brain is also trying to come to terms with all the new STUFF I got!! Seriously, I don't want to come across as showing off, but I bought myself a new camera! (really, I love it so!! But the amount of money is a bit ridiculous! I'm still scared of taking it out of the house and breaking it..) and I got an actual KitchenAid Mixer! Seriously! This has been something I wanted, coveted, loved-from-a-far since I was like 14 years old! (I know, I was a strange kid, and I still am!)
It's even in my favorite colour, Ice blue!!!
This might sound really bad, but I'm still staring at it, after weeks... I only stared at my engagement ring for about a week! Almost in disbelieve...
I haven't used it, yet. I have no room in my current kitchen (it's so tiny) and it was a gift for our new home, so I have to be patient.. It's going to be difficult, but I have to be patient...

This is the part where I have to hang my head in shame.. I don't know (yet!) how to get pictures from my new camera on to my laptop... I know, I know... I'm really bad!!! But I promise I'll read the instructions and get some real pictures on here!

So for now I will leave you with some more pictures, not taken by me, of our new house, soon, our home...
I promise I'll be better and write more!


The kitchen!!!! Ooh, I how I love kitchens!

P.S. This is the "before" of the kitchen! We have worked/cleaned hard, and more, better pictures are coming soon!
Right, now I will go and try to take my new camera outside... Oh my...

Lucky 13!!! (Watch out; long post ahead!)

So, it's been a while, and a lot has happened!

We got the house!!!! Jay!!!!
Well, sort of...

I needed to get a life insurance in order to get a mortgage. For The Boyfriend this was no problem. But I got turned down by two insurance companies. To be honest, it made me very sad, and even angry! I can put your mind at ease, I'm not ill nor am I dying. But I am overweight and I have been ill. This was reason for them not to want to take a risk and insure me. It came as a unexpected blow! I even had blood-work done, and all was perfect, but still, they thought the risk was to high.
I felt miserable. We had been through a lot to try and get this house, and now we might still loose it, because of me.
But then, there was one insurance company that DID want to insure me. Ok, the rates are a bit higher, but still fine, ok, good!

And because everything else is in order, we now can say, we got the house!!!!

To be honest, I still have a 'I'll believe it when I see it' feeling. But I'm sure that will pass, especially when The Boyfriend and I have signed the papers and receive the keys to our new home!

And the date we will get the keys to our new home is... (drum roll please!): Monday 13th December 2010!!!
Who ever said 13 is an unlucky number? Not me!

Because The Boyfriend and I are buying a house together without being married (we're not against getting married, but we want to live together for a bit first.) we are going to sign a co-habiting contract. It states all sort of things. From pensions, to what to do (who gets the house, the stuff) if we separate, what we think can be paid for with our joined checking account, etc.
Figuring this out was a lot of work, and most of the time not a whole lot of fun! But I'm glad we did it. You never know if, when, or why things might go wrong. And it's good to have thought about these things before you have to deal with them.
So, we are signing this contract (probably) the Friday before we get the keys, so on December 10th.
Ok, it's not a wedding, I know this! But it is the closest I've ever been to something resembling a marriage. Neither The Boyfriend nor I have ever lived with someone, so we are both doing this for the first time.
We want to make it a special day. The Boyfriend will take the day off work and we plan to go out to dinner and make it a special day, for us anyway. We'll probably go and sit outside our, then very soon to be, home!
To symbolize this special day we are looking for a ring, for Moi! (I can be such a Girl sometimes!)!
I have a half a carat stone that we are trying to find an old ring/setting for. Something Art Deco or 1940's would be nice.
I love the idea of repairing an old, once loved, ring. So it can be loved once again. And of course, we have a budget to think about, we are buying a house, you know!
We did spot one, but I'm afraid it's going to be a bit too expensive for us...
So, if you know, see, or hear about one, let me know!

I'll try and post more often. Now that I know we might actually get this house I think I'll have more fun writing about it!

However, I don't want to just write about a house. I want to write about making a Home. And the things that I enjoy, and come across. Fun things, and sometimes, not so fun things.

The Boyfriend came home last night and he had bought me the sweetest present! Angel Chimes! We have the silver ones and I'm trying to restrain myself, to keep them in the box until we have the new house!

I'm also looking at bags... I want lot's and lot's of new bags!!! (I know I'm focusing on other things then the house, because I'm still scared it all might not happen.. But that's OK. I like bags!) First I want a small Dooney & Bourke bag, but a vintage one, like this one (but I can't afford that one..).
AND I want a bigger bag! I'm actually looking for a lovely, soft, leather one, in brown. I know of a Michael Kors one I love, but I can't find it, and if I could, I'm afraid I won't be able to afford it... But a girl can dream, can't she?
I want this perfect-bag to have a vintage feel to it. I love the 1940's, and I love vintage stuff, or things that have a vintage-feel to them.
I was thinking about this one, from Zara.
But it's a tad to expensive, and I've looked at it, and I'm afraid it won't be practical in my day-to-day life.
Then there is this one, from Sasha. What I really LOVE about this one is that the lining is of this lovely flower fabric! You can see some of it on the flower on the bag. I love that! And it's in my price range! Well, sort of.. I really can't afford to buy anything right now, let alone a bag.. But if I did (and knowing me, I will..) this would be more my price range.)
What I don't love about the bag, is that it's plastic, and shiny and maybe a bit too orange in real live.

I don't know... I might go back into town tomorrow and look at both bags again. I know I will not be buying any new bags, until this one action on eBay has ended... It's for a ring setting I really love... And, I'm sorry, but, no. I'm not going to tell you which one!

Take a look at our garden!



This is one of the things The Boyfriend and I LOVED about this house, the backyard!
It's bigger then the house is!

Here is a view towards the house..



Aaaah, lovely....